Your team knows the real you

Maybe better than you do

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You think no one can tell…

You think you’re good at keeping things separate…

You think they have nothing to do with one another…

But whatever story is playing in your mind, whatever storm is raging in your belly, is also playing out in your leadership:

• Tone of voice

• Choice of words

• Energy and morale

• Inclusion or exclusion

• Mindset and perspective

• Pressure applied to others

• Quality of decision making

• Actions taken or not taken

• Outcomes achieved

You might not see it, but your team does. They are watching you carefully, gauging your mood, mindset and moves to determine whether they are safe with you and if they can be successful with you.

Does your team know you better than you know yourself?

In the comments: Put yourself in your team’s shoes. When you are stressed, how does it show up from their perspective? What effect does this have on them?

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This week

Give yourself a microdose of mindfulness to disrupt your autopilot’s stress response, using the acronym STOP. When you find yourself in a stressful moment:

• Stop what you’re doing, just for a moment

• Take a breath, really let yourself feel it (make your exhale longer than your inhale, this signals to your nervous system that it can relax)

• Observe what’s happening, inside (tension in the chest, buzzing in the belly) and outside (the temperature of the room, feet solidly on the floor)

• Proceed with what you are doing, with a bit more self-awareness and perspective (maybe don’t send that email just yet)

So simple. It’s just a check-in. It takes a matter of seconds. But it makes all the difference.

Remembering to STOP is the hardest part, so write yourself a STOP post-it you can put on your computer screen, bathroom mirror, refrigerator… wherever.

With a bit of practice, you’ll find yourself STOPping more naturally, and showing up to lead the way you intend to.